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Earlier this afternoon I was performing my daily task of scrutinizing pics
of the males taking part in PocketChangeNYC's speed dating event for "Rich
Older Women and Hot Young Men (Sugar Mamas and Boy Toys)," AKA The Saddest
Story Ever Told/The Greatest Spectator Sport Of All Time (if enough of you
agree to show up on the 7th to watch, they'll consider bringing in
bleachers). Unfortunately for me, today's batch of applicants were about as
exciting as proxy access. No pool cleaners, no horses, NO CRUSHED VELVET. I
was considering writing to PCNYC to vent my frustrations vis-a-vis their
paint drying BTs but decided to retract my claws and give them one more
chance (I've lately been taking my cues from Little Bunny Foo Foo's F.G.,
except the shit about field mice, because those assholes have it coming),
when I came across something that can only be described as smelling like Eau
de Hunter, i.e. FISHY.
A 33 year old toy claiming to be "Mike Darda," an economist with MKM
Partners and CNBC commentator, enclosed five photos. The first three were
all of him on CNBC, which I thought was a little weird and narcissistic and
not necessarily an attribute I'd assign a "boy toy," who's supposed to be
the submissive one that gets told what to do. But I reasoned that maybe he
didn't have any recent photographs of himself and besides, he looked pretty
attractive in the screenshots-- essential to his success at the event. Then
I scrolled down to pics 4 and 5. Imagine my surprise and downright horror to
find that the chappie* in the last two were decidedly NOT Mike Darda. I
forwarded them to a few people who confirmed that I was not crazy (in this
specific instance only), and that the five shots were definitely of two
different dudes. But why would somebody do that? Steal a CNBC commentator's
identity to gain entry to a dating service? And then fuck it up by including
two different faces? Or was the application actually submitted by Mike
Darda, and he added a couple pictures of a less attractive dude, relatively
speaking, to come off as what? Less intimidating to the senior citizens?
I had to shut off my computer and walk out of the room. I needed to get away
from the notion that someone would take something so innocent and pure like
a speed dating event for rich old women and hot young men and taint it with
some sort of sick game. Now, several hours later, I still don't understand.
I'm hoping that it was just a case of incompetence on the part of PCNYC, and
two applicants' portfolios got mixed. But I'm not holding my breath. If you
have any ideas, preferably ones that'll talk me off the ledge, I implore you
to share them now.
Source: http://www.dealbreaker.com/2008/01/speed_dating_scandal.php
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