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The Dating Game

Date: 2007-04-09

The thing about being single for the first time in over six years is that suddenly all sorts of places and situations which were never previously interesting or complicated become loaded with social, sexual and emotional politics.

“You're not at all coy!” My friend Andreas berates me as I tell him of a failed pick up attempt I made.

“You can't just start a conversation with a man and tell him he's good looking” he continues with a disappointed tone.

“Why the hell not?” I argue, refusing to admit to my clumsy social antics. “It makes things so simple, why play the game when you can just take the trophy?”

Apparently you “just can't”. As an Icelandic woman I find this extremely irritating. As a rule we like to get to the point, being straightforward means there is no fuss, no mess. And in all other aspects of my life this has worked wonders but apparently when single a mysterious hard-to-get strategy is the way to go.

As I have not been single since I was 15 years old it is pretty safe to say that I know nothing about the dating scene but I always assumed it was instinctive. It isn't. It is calculated, complex and strategic. When I think about it, it is a bit like playing Risk, and I always lost that game so all around it does not bode well.

I often get asked two questions by foreigners. One is “Do you know Eidur Smári Gudjohnsen who used to play for Chelsea?” and “I hear the Icelandic dating scene is wild and promiscuous. Is that true?”

Well, I usually tell people that Eidur is probably my cousin in some fashion or another since everyone is Iceland is related but that no, I don't know him.

For the second question, well I just don't know the answer. I'm Icelandic and I'm not wild or promiscuous so I guess not.

It might just be a random rumor someone at the Tourist Board started to increase the overall economic situation. But then I do hear people talk about trips to Iceland which included steamy passionate nights with unforgettable native lovers. I have, however, never been on the scene myself so I would not know.

How does it all work? I wonder whether my fellow natives are as bad at being coy as me? Essentially there is only one way to find out, so in the name of research, when I am home this weekend I have decided to become an observer of the Icelanders mating habits. There must be something there since so many people talk about us as though we were nymphomaniacs.

For example, I was writing a Daily Life in the library a few months ago, and a group of guys were using a computer opposite me to look at photos from a holiday one of them had just been on. They then began comparing notes on which country had the most beautiful girls and after discussing Brazil and Sweden, Iceland inevitably came up.

I smiled to myself as I listened to them go on about how sex crazed we apparently are and how perfect our noses look. Although I have a healthy libido myself I am unsure of how sex crazed Icelandic people really are. According to a Durex sex survey, we have an average of 13 partners in a lifetime and to be honest that doesn't seem all that much to me.

But I agree about the noses though; they usually are perfect.





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