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They are the new majority -- women who find themselves, by choice or not, living spouseless. Divorced, widowed, never married, they are women discovering new strengths.
Many rejoice in their independence, their achievements and their ability to go it alone, happily.
They are doctors, teachers, entrepreneurs, supporters of the arts, civic activists, volunteers and yes, the poor. Living without spouses, they constitute a new demographic of the American landscape.
"I view my spouseless life as serene, peaceful and content for now," says Amber Harper, 26, of Fort Lauderdale.
Jeannette Markus of Delray Beach, Fla., agrees.
"I am happy as a clam," says the 48-year-old divorced mother of a college-bound daughter and an active volunteer. "I work hard in my office, maintain a large home by myself, grow orchids and exotic plants in my garden and am friends with every family (in) my neighborhood."
U.S. Census figures for 2005 showed more American women living without a spouse than with one. In 1950, according to analysis by The New York Times, only 35 percent of women made that claim.
Whatever the circumstances, they are mostly leading lives that are productive, active and joyful.
"If I had my druthers, I would prefer a partnership," says Rhonnie Robins, divorced and living single in Boca Raton, Fla., for the past three years. But at 51, Robins says "I've lost my fear of just about everything, gained a lot of self-respect and learned 'I can' -- no matter what. I've become scuba certified, and though I've had a motorcycle license for 20 years, who'd have thought I would purchase my own Harley! I completed a Disney Marathon in 2004 ... I've never felt more emotionally, mentally, physically or spiritually complete. It's truly been an awesome awakening."
No longer defined by the expectations or aspirations of a 1950s-and-before generation, these fearless new women make no apologies for getting along fine without a wedding band.
Laura Finley, director of social change at Women in Distress, a shelter for victims of domestic violence in Broward County and visiting professor of sociology at Florida Atlantic University in Boca Raton, sees the trend as a natural extension of the women's movement.
"We now have a generation of people who partly say that it's okay to be by myself, people who have devoted themselves to a career because that option became available to them because of the women's movement," she notes.
Women may not love the fact they do not have a mate, says Finley, "but they're comfortable with being alone." And those involved in sexual relationships don't necessarily feel compelled today to take the relationship "to that next level of commitment."
"I have been in love once and would rather save that memory than be in an unhappy relationship," says Harper, of Fort Lauderdale. "I would like to be married one day, but that spark doesn't happen often and when the time is right, I believe it will happen."
Jane Caputi, professor of women's studies at FAU, notes that historically, "women really had to be married to be economically viable and socially acceptable. You had a few women, nuns and lesbians, for instance, who weren't, but women's sexuality and women's economic possibilities were so controlled, most women were married. And any who weren't were seen as disreputable women."
Modern capitalism changed all that with women gaining access to full employment and, as a result, economic independence.
That's allowed women, says Caputi, " to forge new models of community and relationships, (and) function happily and with economic stability."
Having said that, Caputi notes, economic independence is still illusory for many women.
"We don't want to forget these joys of singlehood are not available to women with working-class or lower-class wages. Singlehood means something far different to poorer women."
Less jubilant, too, about going it alone are women isolated by age, frailty and the loss of a beloved husband.
By MARGO HARAKAS
South Florida Sun-Sentinel
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