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Five things to watch out for in a personals ad:

Date: 2007-02-12

1. Lists of activities he doesn't like and would never do tell you he's a wet blanket.

2. Putdowns of past dates show a general lack of respect for humankind, especially for the humans she dated.

3. Specific dealbreakers — "No mama's boys," or "Only girls who wear backward baseball caps and root for the Bears" — signal a person who isn't over loving (or hating) his or her ex.

4. Typos and grammatical mistakes warn of a schlub who'll show up for Date No. 1 with a stain in his shirt.

5. Assume that when categories such as "Marital Status" and "kids" are left blank, this person is/was married with kids.

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