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Do: A background check. You don't want to invest a bunch of time only to find out she has a husband and two kids (or worse, a criminal record). Checks of various detail and prices are available. True.com conducts criminal and marital checks on all its members. Others to try include Intelius, Trufina and Jangl.
Don't: Give up your personal information too soon. He doesn't need your phone number after a few e-mails. Never give your address until you know her well enough to feel comfortable.
Do: Meet in a public place. Tell your close friends what you are doing, where you are going and when they should expect you back. And that way, there's always something to look at if he starts talking about his mother -- non-stop.
Don't: Have him pick you up. You want a backup plan in case he has an extra eye or laughs like Pee Wee Herman. Plus, it's just not safe for him to know where you live that soon in the process.
Do: Take the chance. Who knows? You might be a success story, or you may just find some interesting friends.
Don't: Look for that person to complete you. If you consider online dating your last chance for love, seek outside help. Sarah Lane of Douglas didn't make a connection, but she wasn't heartbroken. "I feel pretty complete. I was looking for someone with similar interests."
Do: Be a good date. When and if you finally meet, be polite, interesting and try to seem interested in your date. Smile. Laugh at her jokes.
Don't: Plan the wedding. Even if it's clear as day in your head, right down to the color of napkins for the guest table, don't tell him about how many kids you want to have or where the two of you should settle.
Do: Always stay safe. If something feels weird when you finally meet, trust your gut. Never do anything that makes you feel uncomfortable.
Don't: Obsess. Take it for what it is -- two people who seem to have similar interests who'd like to find out more. Leave it at that.
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