In last week's column, single women were pretty tough on the quality of single men in the over 50 dating pool. I asked for men to respond. Here's what one of them had to say. We will call him Mike.
Mike, 56, said, "I've been searching online for about two years. I don' think I fit the stereotypes these women talk about. I find a lot of women have an agenda about dating. At least from the profiles, it seems they want to be wined and dined constantly. I don' want to be constantly doing this until I' sure the relationship is going somewhere."
I can't blame Mike there, many single men tell me they are tired of always having to dig into their pockets to pay for expensive dates. That's why a first date for coffee or a walk in the harbor is prudent for men, to see if a relationship even has a chance before dropping a ton of money.
Mike addressed another beef of women, "As for the constant complaint that men want women a lot younger, I don't know what I'd talk about with someone 20-30 years younger than me." Unlike many older single men, Mike would be happy dating a woman closer to his age.
What's the current state of dating for age 50-plus men? Mike had thoughts on that also. "It seems to be a lot tougher to get together with ladies than it was 5 to 10 years ago. There always seems to be something that gets in the way. I realize that at our age, schedules and commitments are more involved than when I was in my 20's-40's. I guess I'm in the minority, at least as far as women's comments seem. I treat women like ladies until they prove otherwise," Mike said.
Perhaps Mike is a rarity. He assumes women are ladies when he first approaches them. Apparently, he finds that some aren't the ladies he thought they'd be.
Mike described his most recent date: "I was supposed to meet a gal from Yahoo! last night at 6 p.m. in the Spectrum. As I was leaving my office at 5:30 p.m., she called to say there was a delay in picking up her daughter's car at the dealer, but they closed at six, that she might be a little late. I said fine, but please let me know if you're not gonna make it. I'm there at six."
The woman didn't show up. Mike said, "At 6:45, I left a message on her cell phone and paged her. At 7 p.m., I shined it and split. I left her a message on her work number and as of this writing, I haven't heard anything back. This is rude behavior. I've never stood anyone up in my life."
Mike summed up his thoughts: "There's at least one good guy still out there."
Maybe a nice single woman near his age will want to meet Mike. If she e-mails me, I will forward her e-mail to him.
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