Dear Abby: I am a 23-year-old woman who always has had a hard time disappointing people or saying no. A few months ago, I met a man online who lived across the country, and within a week he told me he loved me. Because of emotional and relationship problems in my past, I enjoyed hearing it and told him I loved him, too. Now I realize I was in love with the idea of being in love.
Two weeks after that, he proposed. We had never met. Being the person I am, I said yes. He told me he was going to buy plane tickets for me as soon as he could find a place to live.
I called him later that night to tell him I was sorry, but I couldn't accept his proposal. He became irate and said he had bought the tickets, and unless I was on that plane he would sue me for the money he'd spentNow he's threatening to send some indecent pictures that he somehow managed to get from a past lover of mine to all my family and friends. Can he sue me, and how should I deal with his threats about the pictures?
- Not in Love in the USA
Dear Not in Love: Your online suitor is either vindictive or an extortionist or both. Ignore his threats about sending the pictures. You're lucky your common sense kicked in before things went any further. If he bought the tickets, he might be able to take you to small claims court. However, the larger lesson here has to do with the revealing photos that wound up on the Internet. In the cold light of day, such X-rated images can be a huge embarrassment.
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