Recently, a list was released of the words that should be banned for 2007. The list does include some that have to do with relationships. Both are the cutesy kind that make you want to attack anyone in a relationship who might use them. There’s “We’re pregnant,” which, as my witty and brilliant friend Jordan says, makes him want to want to forcibly hand out birth control to anyone who utters it or might ever utter it. And there’s the portmanteau combined-name relationships — you know, like Bennifer, Brangelina, etc.
Please, tell me none of you ever refer to yourselves that way!
Anyway, it got me thinking about what phrases I think should be banned in and around relationships. My No. 1 offender, for sure: “I only…” There should be no “only” when it comes to relationships — “I only date black women,” “I only date men with college degrees,” “I only want someone who makes more money than me.” Leave yourself open to possibilities — the exception to the rule may surprise you. It usually does for me.
Others: “You complete me.” Gag. You should be a complete person by yourself before attempting to be in a relationship, thank you very much Jerry Maguire. Perhaps “You complement me”…may not have the same ring to it, but it’s a lot healthier.
“If you really loved me, you’d…” This one needs no explanation, clearly. Love is not a test.
“The wife” or “the husband” or “the boyfriend.” As in “Yes, I’d like to go, but the wife doesn’t want to.” Not an object. Come on now.
“I hate all men” or “I hate all women.” I’m super guilty of this one myself. But I realized how bad it made me feel when I heard my ex — after a different relationship went bad — say “All women are evil.” Really? Just that one was, right?
What other words and phrases would you ban? Why? How can we create a healthier language of relationships?
What things does your significant other say that you never want to hear again?
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