|
Out of the 500,000 or so people who live in Volusia County, more than 100,000 are single. However, time after time bachelors and bachelorettes often find themselves asking the same question: "Why is it so hard to meet people?"
It's a question that haunts Port Orange resident Todd Schryver.
Despite the number of available singles in the area, the accountant found himself left out. His co-workers were mostly married, and going out by himself just didn't seem right.
After two years of complaining, he decided to take action. He founded Volusia County Singles -- a social network for the locally unattached between ages 30 and 50. Schryver said he found a lack of opportunities for people in those ages to "get together and socialize."
At the same time, he stressed the group isn't about singles meeting love interests, but rather coming together for fun and friendship. However, if two people feel a certain attraction and want to be more than friends, that's OK also, he said.
"It's better than a dating Web site because you are forced to meet people face to face rather than judge them from a photo or a profile," he said. "But it's also relaxed because there is no agenda or pressure of dating. It's simply a way for people to get out of the house."
Laurie Moore, a marriage and family therapist in Santa Cruz, Calif., said informal gatherings are usually the best ways to begin a more serious relationship.
"You are just in a nicer position to notice the people that you have things in common with, rather than when it's an official date and you are sizing each other up," Moore said.
It became obvious that Schryver was onto something because six weeks after he launched the group in July, there were 32 members. By New Year's Day, that number jumped to 111.
He relies on word of mouth and tiny newspaper ads to attract new members. While several friendships have been made, Schryver said he knew of just one official couple.
"The group is doing well," he said. "We're running eight to 10 events a month. My goal is a membership of 300, running 20 events per month with an average attendance of 20."
Events vary from the Pink Floyd Experience at the Peabody Auditorium in Daytona Beach to a children-and-pets picnic at Gemini Springs in DeBary.
On a cool fall evening, about 20 members gathered at Caribbean Jacks for happy hour. They sat on the deck with the Intracoastal Waterway and Daytona Beach skyline as a backdrop, and they chatted about everything from TV shows and sports to relationships.
The personalities are just as varied as their discussion topics. Ormond Beach resident Beth Williams is adventurous, outspoken, and has no qualms about going to movies or even dinner by herself.
Across from her is single mom Valerie Simons. Going anywhere by herself is a frightening thought for the DeBary resident. She even brought a friend to her first gathering with the singles club.
She is Williams' opposite, but they both joined for the same reason. "It's a good way to meet new people," Williams said. "I enjoy the camaraderie. I enjoy getting together."
"It's safe," Simons added. "It's a way not to feel any pressure."
Even the guys feel the same way.
South Daytona resident Brett Edmonds said after working to get a decent job and a nice place to live, he looked around one day and noticed he didn't have a social life.
"There wasn't really anyone I could hang out with," he said. Plus, he wasn't the kind of guy who could approach a woman in a bar. . . . "It just isn't me."
When he came across an ad for the singles group, he thought it would be a perfect match.
"I wouldn't have to worry about the pressures of going to a bar, and I would get to meet people," he said. "Maybe even make a few friends."
Those numbers suggest there should be plenty of partners to go around.
| 
