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Some call the prospect of online dating extreme, but statistics prove the growing popularity of it's as a way that's becoming more mainstream for folks in the Madison area.
Putting your name, photos and other information about yourself on the Internet might seem like an unsafe thing to do. In fact, safety experts and a local woman who ran into some scary situations both said those interested in the idea should take steps to protect themselves.
Dawn Ristow's online dating story ends happily enough, but it was the road to get there that was a little scarier, WISC-TV reported.
"They will lie to get you into bed, they'll lie to spend your money, they'll lie just to lie," Ristow of her experience.
She said that she expected some exaggeration, but what she didn't imagine was stalker tendencies among some of those she met online.
"He still would drive by where I work, call me and hang up and finally, I said, 'I'm sorry that this is not working out, but I'm sure there is somebody out there for you that is going to work out, but you can't keep doing this because you're freaking me out,'" said Ristow.
The number of users complaining about the liars or stalkers that they found online has increased pressure on online dating Web sites to bulk up their safety measures. Just a few years ago, True.com entered the market, which is the first Web site to guarantee background checks for criminal or marital history, WISC-TV reported.
Janet Jenkins, an administrator with the Wisconsin Department of Consumer Protection, said that safety should be a concern for all online dating users.
"I think when you're not face to face, and you don't really know with whom you're dealing and anybody can pretend to be anybody, when they're online, you do have to be careful," said Jenkins.
Department officials said that while the amount of control someone has over the online dating experience is better than with traditional office-based dating services, and they've only gotten complaints about billing for online sites, they would like to see sufficient protection or notification letting daters know that they're on their own, WISC-TV reported.
"I think the more information that consumers have before they commit to something is a good thing, because you can't really protect yourself without information," said Jenkins.
Ristow said that despite meeting her husband online, if she did it all over again, she'd be even more cautious.
"You never heard of all the horror stories that are out now, so it didn't occur to me that anything horrible would happen," said Ristow. "Just don't on a whim think things will be 100-percent safe, because it just might not be."
Ristow said that she created a plan for dating after the stalking incident. She said that she approached things much more cautiously, planning out her dates and making arrangements with friends to make sure that she'd be safe. She said that she and her friends actually created phone signals, where they'd call a half-hour into the date and she'd let them know in some way whether it was going well or whether she wanted to leave. Ristow said that it helped her get out of some uncomfortable situations.
Some experts said that they advise users to have a plan just as Ristow did.
Here are some tips:
- Don't give out personal information at the beginning and make sure you use first names only. Also, be vague about your address and don't put identifying things from your home in online photos.
- Don't be rushed and don't rush anyone. Take things slowly and make contact at your own pace.
- Finally, when you do meet, do it in a public place. Let friends know where you'll be and when to expect you home.
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