I don’t speak about such occasions as birthdays, the anniversary of meeting, New Year and so on. I mean ordinary days that don’t differ from others! Why to give flowers without any occasion?
They say that poets have a heightened sensibility to the essence of things. Maybe this is why they love to compare a woman to a flower?
Flowers are a permanent attribute of any love story. Can you imagine courting without flowers?
Flowers are a compliment to a lady, the way of saying that a man finds her feminine.
Huge bouquets in the shape of a heart or delicate tulips that touch a heart of any woman – it doesn’t matter. The most important thing is to show your attention. In Russia there is a song, which is known by nearly all. It is about an artist who sold everything, his pictures and house, to give his beloved “the whole sea of flowers” – “a million of scarlet roses”!
Here is the letter of one young girl:
“Maybe someone will consider it to be a trifle, but still. I do want flowers. As a gift. For no special reason. But my boyfriend can’t guess to give them to me. He is a nice guy, but apparently he can’t court a girl well. What can I do and how to receive flowers from him at times?”
This question was addressed to other girls in the internet-forum.I find it interesting that she asks this kind of question: the girl is tired of waiting and she wants to undertake some actions and asks to help her with ideas. It is a revolution! :) We know already what was the outcome of one female revolution in America, maybe we should suppress it in the very beginning? :))
Once American journalist interviewed me and she remarked that I often urged men to give presents to their Russian brides. She asked: “Is it a must?” I wanted to respond by the question: “Why not?” :)
But at the same time I think that maybe it is uncustomary in the West indeed? Romantic Hollywood movies convince me of the opposite: things are all right with romance, flowers and presents in the West. Though I notice sometimes that Hollywood Factory of Dreams and real West have nothing in common.
But let’s return to our Russian girls. What did they advise to their “fellow-sufferer”?Opinions varied, but they can be divided into the following groups:
1. Give a gentle hint
- A woman can act much more delicately than to ask straightforward. For example, when you pass by a flower shop, halt for a while and after going some way away from it, say that you think the most beautiful flowers are (name). Or say while a suitable shot in a movie: “Oh, how romantic it is, he gave her flowers!”
- Tell him how much you love to have natural flowers in a vase at home. Well, for example, when I long for flowers, I say “aaaaaaaa”, rush to flower-girls and gaze at all sorts of gerberas and butter cups. Since a man is shy to take out a purse and buy me some flowers immediately, he does it softly in a couple of days in the evening after work.
- We were in a subway and there was a gerbera on the poster there. I said: “Oh, it is my favorite flower!”. And most importantly it sounded as if I hadn’t made any hints!
2. Tell him straightforward!
- Men rarely understand gentle hints :)
- Just say: “I want flowers!”
- I say to him directly “Somehow I so much want a floooower…”
- You should brace yourself and say looking into his eyes: “Sweetie, it happened so, that I am the kind of girl that loves being given flowers!”
- I said to him: “Mmm, why don’t you give me flowers?”, and my boyfriend promised to improve and have given me flowers a couple of times :)
- Tell him straightforward: “I love lilies”. Or roses. Or whatever you prefer.
3. Act on your own!
- It had an effect on my husband when I had bought flowers myself at his presence a couple of times.
- Give flowers to him. It works 90% :-)
4. Change your attitude!
- It seems the matter of flowers is rather not about the flowers themselves, but wish for romance, tenderness and so on. And flowers are just an expression of all these things. Maybe he expresses his romantic feelings in a different way?
- My man says that he doesn’t want to present “dead bodies of flowers”. It is his only shortcoming, so I put up with it.
Well, I’ve disclosed all women’s secrets to you! :)) Now you know all our tricks, but I have a question! Or more precisely, a favor to ask of you: don’t drive your beloved ladies to such state. Just give them flowers more frequently! Without any special occasion – just for a good mood, for romantic spirit.
If a woman doesn’t like cut flowers, pot roses aren’t worse at all! If she doesn’t like flowers completely, send her a lovely card, or a box of sweets. All these things are trifles, but our life is made of them. Then in many years your beloved will remember how beautifully you courted her. Believe me, these sweet memories will warm her heart for a long while. I say it to you being a woman myself! :)))
|#1 Jim (USA) at 2006-04-10|
|I have been nothing but asked for money and sent copies of false VISA's and|
fake passports. why would I waste my time, effort and money on these women
who are obviously just as deceitful as American Women ? Do I send flowers
to 1,000 women and maybe one woman will actually want the flowers and not
the money ? The one scam is send flowers, the girl gets 60% on the cost in
money and the flower shop keeps 40%.... It seems like one big scam. The US
isn't protecting these women they are protecting us men from being scammed.
|Author's answer: Dear Jim,|
It’s a pity that you consider all women deceitful. You had bad experience in the past.
Unfortunately everyone can come across scammers who try to deceive decent people and it’s good that you recognized the fraud at once. But one can’t claim that all women are the same.
I wish you could see happy faces of women who get flowers unexpectedly or for some special occasion. It’s so important for a woman to receive a sign of attention not only through letters but through a bouquet of fresh flowers as a proof that the man is really thinking about her. Flowers help her to forget that there are thousands of miles between them, they bring them closer together. Most women are romantic creatures for whom such attention is more important than any material things. A woman doesn’t think what percent goes to a flower shop and what the real price of flowers is. Of course she realizes that it could be cheaper if a person lives in the same area and buys the flowers himself. But believe me, she appreciates this gesture twice as much when a man orders something for her being in another country.
I just wish you to find the right woman you will want to send flowers and other gifts to with pleasure.
All the best,
ChanceForLove Dating Network
|#2 John (United States of America) at 2005-12-28|
I read the comment about sending flowers and I have to take exception at the part about it not being important in the West! I have been writing to a beautiful lady from Odessa and I have only been writing to her for two monts. I have sent flowers to her in the middle of the week on two occasions and for no other reason then to brighten her day. I don't know if it is the same there but here about the middle of the week it gets pretty hard to concentrate. We call Wednesday "Hump day" which means you made it past the hump and are on the way to the week end. I may be different then alot of men as I was raised by a true Southern Gentleman and was taught that you treat a Lady like a Lady at all times and make sure that you keep her attention by giving her yours. If there are any men reading this that have not sent flowers to their special ladies... WAKE UP STUPID!! My Daddy always said " If you want me to beleive you, show me actions, I hear words everyday!!" Come on guys, flowers are a beautiful simple way to let your lady know that she is on your mind! Elena was almost in tears the first time I sent her flowers because she felt she hardly knew me. Well, she knows me alot better now and she is still touched by the simple gesture of sending flowers to brighten her day. Just wanted you to know not all Western men are so dense. John.
|Author's answer: Nice to heart it, John!|
Your letter is just what I wrote about in my article. Flowers are a sign of attention, a simple way to show your warm feelings to a lady, when you have so many miles between you. Your father is a very wise man, I like his saying! Thank you, John, for sharing your story with us!